Doubting Salvation: My Journey to Assurance

Dance practice seemed the same as always that day. We girls were talking as we changed and stretched and transitioned from school to practice.

But then the conversation turned to more spiritual matters. I can’t remember how or what was said now to get it started. I just remember a comment one of my friends made: of course you can lose your salvation.

Of course. Like everyone knew that it was so obvious.

I’d made my decision with Christ years before and felt pretty secure in that decision. I knew I didn’t know a whole lot, but I tried to do what I thought God wanted me to—including reading my Bible every night and being a good example to others.

The idea of losing salvation was foreign to me, and at first, I was pretty incredulous. That conversation played in my head a lot after that, though, and eventually I was pretty shaken as I entertained the possibility.

I had lots of questions. Had I already lost my salvation? I messed up all the time. How did I know if I’d lost it? How could I get it back? Did it work the same as the first time?

Doubting Salvation: My Journey to Assurance | HISsparrowBlog | #christianliving #losingsalvation

Doubting Salvation

That one day of dance practice threw me for a loop. I struggled with so many things already, but I didn’t know I had to worry about losing my very foundation.

What a scary world. The one thing—one Person—I thought I could trust wasn’t even a guarantee.

I can’t really tell you the exact thought process I went through at the time. That was probably twenty years ago, and I’ve never been known for my memory, but I do remember that my doubts led me back to the basics.

Over several years of looking, praying, thinking, and studying, I found my answers in the only place I really knew was reliable—the Bible I read every night.

My doubts of salvation led me back to the basics—the Bible I read every night. #HISsparrowBlog #blessedassurance Click To Tweet

The Answers I Found to My Doubt

I think a lot of issues that trip us up can be easier when we take them back to the basics. Like lying for example. Lying is lying even when you try to cover up something in the hopes of “helping” someone.

The issue of losing salvation is easier to understand when you take it back to what you know.

All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away. Isaiah 64:6 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

So what are the basics of salvation?

First: Understand that apart from Christ I’m basically a filthy rag.

Second: Believe that Christ, the Son of God, came to Earth, died for my sins, and rose again on the third day.

Third: Confess my need for a Savior and accept Jesus as Lord.

If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. Romans 10:9 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

So Then What?

Then I asked myself a few questions, all of which are answered by the basics of salvation.

Question: When did I get saved?

Answer: When I was about eight, I was sitting in church listening to the preacher’s sermon when I understood he was talking to me; I was lost and had no hope of salvation on my own. I confessed my need of a Savior that night and surrendered my life to Jesus.

Question: What did I DO to be saved?

Answer: Nothing. I believed, but I didn’t earn it.

Question: So how could I lose salvation BY MY ACTIONS if I couldn’t EARN MY SALVATION by my actions?

Answer: I can’t.

For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. Ephesians 2:8-9 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

Security

It’s been a long time since I first came to that conclusion. Although the issue really has been settled in my mind, every now and then a comment or fear will creep in and try to make me question again.

When that happens, I just do it again. Get back to the basics.

Honestly, it hasn’t been that much of a problem for me since that day. I may struggle with a lot of things, but I can always cling to the fact Jesus saved me when I didn’t deserve it.

I pray today that if you’re struggling with this issue, you’ll find hope in my journey.

Sometimes the easy part of identity is knowing that in Christ we are X, Y, and Z, but Satan’s really good at hitting us at the center of the issue. We can’t be anything in Christ if we’re not in Christ.

I pray today you’re secure in the fact that you are in Christ. You don’t have to know the exact date and time of your salvation (I don’t know my own), just that you made that decision.

If you’ve never made it, then you should visit my page Weary Sparrow. As I said earlier, you can’t be anything in Christ until you’re in Christ.


In the spirit of ‘back to the basics,’ here are more verses that have helped me in my journey in place of the usual additional resources.

What does the LORD your God require from you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways and love Him, and to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul. Deuteronomy 10:12 NASB | HISsparrowBlog
God so loved the world, He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3_16 | HISsparrowBlog
My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me; and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand. John 10: 27-28 NASB | HISsparrowBlog
And now you Gentiles have also heard the truth, the Good News that God saves you. And when you believed in Christ, he identified you as his own by giving you the Holy Spirit, whom he promised long ago. Ephesians 1:13 NASB | HISsparrowBlog
When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross. Colossians 2:13-14 NASB | HISsparrowBlog
By this will we have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all. Hebrews 10_10_  NASB | HISsparrowBlog _ christian living
These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, so that you may know that you have eternal life. 1 John 5:13 NASB | HISsparrowBlog | christian living

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HISsparrowBlog

I love to help people see their value in Christ because once we understand that our potential to lead healthy lives that impact others for Christ is limitless.

This Post Has 18 Comments

  1. Gena

    I love that God’s light shines through you!

  2. Tiffany Montgomery

    I am so thankful we have security… if salvation could be lost and we always had to be good or live up to some standard I would never make it… as Jesus knew or He wouldn’t have come to make a way for us. Thank you for these encouraging workds

  3. Aimee Imbeau

    So many believers doubt their salvation – and I’ve been one of them! Thanks for the truth in this post. And thanks for linking it up with Grace & Truth. I’ve chosen your post as my feature this week.

  4. Jana

    I’m thankful for your willingness to share so openly about your journey to assurance. And I’m thankful to the Lord for making it possible for us to be assured of our salvation! I love that you turned to God’s Word for the answers you were looking for! The book of 1 John is a great one to read and study on this issue. John says it’s the very reason he wrote the book in chapter 5:13 – “These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, SO THAT you make KNOW that you have eternal life.”

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Love that verse, Jana! I may add that one to my list here. Thanks for stopping in!

  5. Heather Hart

    I love this post, Ashley! This is something I have struggled with as well. I wasn’t introduced to the concept until later in life, and I was frustrated that no one would take the time to explain it to me. Which is part of the reason I love this post so much. Thanks for linking up with Grace and Truth. I’m featuring this post tomorrow for our weekly link-up on Candidly Christian.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Unfortunately, this seems to be one of those topics that people don’t want to discuss for whatever reason, but there are a lot of people struggling the insecurity that doubting salvation brings. I couldn’t say no one would discuss it with me as a kid; I kept my fears to myself as is my usual MO. Thanks so much for the feature this week!

  6. Marty

    I love reading the OT as God talks about calling a people to Himself…we are His chosen people. What a beautiful truth to hold to!

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      You’re right! It’s a beautiful thing. Thanks for stopping in.

  7. Valerie Riese

    I loved this the first time I read it and I love it even more now. Congratulations on being featured on Grace & Truth! You’ve provided such precious reassurance and I love the images you made for people to keep as reminders. It’s a beautiful collection!

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Thank you so much for the encouragement, Valerie! And I’m so glad you found this post helpful. This is such a difficult topic for some, so I wasn’t sure how this article would be received.

  8. Linda Stoll

    Ashley, what grace to know He never forsakes His own. He carries us, treasures us, guards us, protects us. He never lets go. I’m so grateful …

    What a wonderful Savior!

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