How To Stop Being Jealous of Other People

Since the fall of mankind, jealousy has plagued us—just ask Cain—but we don’t have to succumb to the green devil. Read on for some thoughts on how to stop being jealous of other people. 


Jealousy has been a faithful—or shall I say haunting?—companion to mankind since the dawn of time. The first son ever born murdered his own brother because he was jealous of his little brother’s sacrifice to God.  The very first son to live on this earth. 

Joseph was sold into slavery because of his brothers’ jealousy—spending years as a servant and even in prison. 

David murdered one of his own soldiers because he was jealous of the man’s beautiful wife.

As sure as the sun rises in the east, we’ve all struggled with jealousy at some point in our lives. Sometimes consciously. Sometimes unconsciously. And sometimes we justify it. We say we’re happy for our friend’s success at work and then wonder why things don’t seem as easy for us. We like—no, “love”—our friend’s engagement pictures on Facebook and then wonder why we can’t seem to find the same thing. We fawn over the baby pictures our friend shows us and then secretly ask God what they did right for such a beautiful gift. 

And on and on.

We are glad for our friends, and we wouldn’t murder them to take away their success (at least I sure hope not), but we want what they have too. Many times we allow bitterness to lead us to pointing out the faults of our friends—the opposite of the expected behavior of a child of God. But what can we do?

How To Stop Being Jealous of Other People | HISsparrowBlog

How to Stop Being Jealous of Other People’s Success

It may be a tall order to stop being jealous. After all, jealousy is an unfortunate presence in these earthly bodies, but the wonderful news is we don’t have to let it rule us. Here’s how.

#1 – Remember from whence you came.

The truth is we all started with a negative balance on our account. We are all sinners bound for hell with no way to save ourselves. That’s who we are.

Until Jesus said to our souls, “I love you still. Be mine.” And we accepted.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 NASB

#2 – Remember who you are in Christ. 

Once we accept Jesus as Lord and Savior, we are new creatures—clothed in the righteousness of the sinless blood of Christ.

Instead of lost, we become found. Before, we were liars, thieves, and murderers. Now, we’re redeemed, enough, treasured, and never alone.

If anyone is in Christ, he's a new creature; the old things passed away. New things have come. 2 Corinthians 5:17 NASB

#3 – Remember your own blessings.

Absolutely everything we have in our lives are blessings lavished upon us by a merciful God who, not only saves our lives, but gives us yet more.  

We haven’t earned anything we have; even our physical abilities are a gift of God. We are abundantly blessed, and it probably wouldn’t hurt us to write down our blessings instead of our wants occasionally.

For who considers you as superior? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as if you had not received it? 1 Corinthians 4:7 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

#4 – Remember that God knows best.

God knows every minute detail about us, and He has a plan for each of our lives. Sometimes those plans don’t involve what we think they should, but we can know He never withholds good from us. If God has another plan, we can know that He has a better plan for us.

For I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

#5 – Pray for help.

As humans, we’re all about what we don’t have. It’s so easy to see those around us and laser focus on what they have without seeing the big picture.

We must look to the One who provides all we need—including our contentment.

I will raise my eyes to the mountains; From where will my help come? My help comes from the LORD, Who made heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1-2 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

#6 – Pray for a genuine love for the fortune of others.

We tell ourselves we don’t wish those around us didn’t receive their blessings, we just wish we had them too. At the heart, though, is plain jealousy. We can’t be truly happy for someone else when we’re jealous of them.

Let us pray that we would have a genuine, Godly love for those around us.

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Philippians 2:3-4 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

Jealousy has certainly been a companion to mankind since the beginning, but that doesn’t mean it has to rule us forevermore.

The blood of Christ frees us, and God lavishes goodness upon us. May we remember that we are loved and provided for beyond all measure.

Do you ever feel jealous of other people’s success? What helps you? Let me know in the comments below.


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I frequently link up with the following: Grace & Truth with Embracing the Unexpected, Tell His Story with Jeanne Takenaka, and Let’s Have Coffee with Joanne Viola.

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I love to help people see their value in Christ because once we understand that our potential to lead healthy lives that impact others for Christ is limitless.

This Post Has 18 Comments

  1. Patti Burkett

    What a great topic. You’re so right in saying we all struggle with jealousy sometimes. I especially love the way you detail the subtler forms it takes in our thoughts. Thank you for this encouragement today!

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      We certainly do, and we’re good at justifying sometimes, aren’t we? Thanks so much for stopping by, Patti!

  2. Theresa Boedeker

    Great points, here. Each can help us be less jealous. # 2 and #3 are the ones I turn to the most. It’s humbling to remember how much we have and don’t deserve.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Those really get me, too, Theresa. Thank you for your comment today!

  3. Lisa notes

    “Jealousy has certainly been a companion to mankind since the beginning, but that doesn’t mean it has to rule us forevermore.” Good points!

  4. PaulaShort

    I love your insights and encouraging tips here. Thank you for sharing.

  5. Valerie

    Great encouraging points. God knows best! I sometimes need to remind myself that God is in control of everything and it’s not by chance.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Yes! Excellent point, Valerie! It’s never by chance.

  6. Donna

    Ashley, jealousy isn’t something many people like to admit much less talk about! But we all suffer from it now and then. Your tips are great, especially remembering where we came from and who we are in Christ. Thank you for bringing this topic out into the open!

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Oh, for the day when there is no more jealousy, right? Thank you for your comment, Donna!

  7. Joanne Viola

    Ashley, such a good post and each point well taken. Jealousy will destroy a relationship faster than one can imagine. When I find that emotion rearing its ugly head in my life, it is #3 which always helps me. Remembering all the Lord has already given me fills me with a deep and settling contentment (and gratitude) and uproots the green tendril quickly.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Yes! All that he’s given…It reminds me of the Jordan Feliz song “Count that High”. I can’t even count all the blessings God has lavished upon me. Thanks so much for stopping by, Joanne!

  8. Yvonne Chase

    Jealousy is at the root of many broken relationships. Why waste time being jealous of others when we can revel in the uniqueness of how we are fearfully and wonderfully made and the individual plan God has for our lives? Salient points in this post that can set us free.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Yes! It amazes me sometimes at our paradoxical desire to be unique yet like everyone else at the same time. Thanks for taking the time to comment, Yvonne!

  9. ~ linda

    This is a fine post on a topic not easily confronted as we walk this life’s paths. It does rear it’s ugly head far more often than I care to admit, but I see it. The Scriptures are perfect and the perfect reminders to place alongside while I walk this journey.
    (That photo of the blue house is awful and amazing all at once. Some major storm got that one. I pray no one was in it as it was being swept along and away.)
    Thanks, ~ linda

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      I love that picture with all its conflict. Thank you for commenting, Linda!

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