5 Simple Reminders for When You Can’t Forgive Yourself for Past Mistakes

Do you beat yourself up over past mistakes? I think we all do at some point. Check this post out to see five reminders that have helped me.


I have a theory: Most Christians, at one time or another in our lives, can’t get over our past sins. Whether they were minor or major—before salvation or after—we struggle to accept our inability to change our past mistakes. 

We feel especially ashamed of those sins committed after salvation. This is a big one for me. I mean, I got saved at eight. Practically my whole life has been lived after my salvation.  

I should’ve known. 

And then comes the mind trail. You know the one. In a life-flashes-before-your-eyes-kind-of-way we imagine the positive direction our lives could’ve taken without even that one mistake. 

Didn’t date that person. Choose that major. All the things.

Yep. Life would be somewhere close to perfect probably. 

Closer to God. 

More successful. 

Insert eye roll. But you know what I’m talking about! That stupid mind trail. 

Well, I’m tired of it, and I’m convinced that we don’t have to fall into those traps anymore. We can find relief from the what-ifs. My mindset about past mistakes has changed in a big way lately. No major epiphanies or anything. Just sweet little reminders. 

I’m not “cured” by any means. These things just seem to circle ‘round, but I do have ammunition to prepare me for the next go.     

Now before we get to it…

I think before we can get down to business, a couple of things should be addressed first. Or at least a couple of questions asked and answered. We have to ask ourselves:

#1 – Is the sin actually in the past?

Before we get started really addressing past sins and mistakes, we have to honestly ask ourselves if they are indeed past. It does no good to try and forgive ourselves of something ongoing, because that’s a current issue and conviction is rightly causing the discomfort. If that’s the problem, better get right on it—pronto. 

#2 – Have we confessed to God and asked forgiveness?

Once we’re sure our sin is in the past, we must ask ourselves if we ever confessed and sought forgiveness for that sin from God and anyone else affected by it.   

5 Simple Reminders for When You Can't Forgive Yourself for Past Mistakes | HISsparrowBlog

Reminders for When Past Mistakes Haunt You

#1 – We make mistakes. 

For real. I’m sure this is news to you. Kidding, but we all know that somehow it’s easy to forget we’re not perfect as we berate ourselves. 

Being a child of God doesn’t somehow make us immune to sin.

We make mistakes. And one thing’s for sure: we’re gonna make more. 

All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away. Isaiah 64:6 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

#2 – We haven’t been asked to be perfect.

God’s not surprised by our mistakes. He never asked us to be perfect, because He knows we can’t. 

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 NASB

#3 – Maybe, even with all our mistakes, we’re right where God wants us.

It blows my mind to think of this, but I know the God I serve uses all situations for His purpose. He is God. He is the Keeper of Time. And He is the Great Author who somehow weaves the intended ending with each imperfect character—and our mistakes. 

The mind of man plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps. Proverbs 16:9 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

#4 – This is what it’s all about.

The whole point of everything is that we can’t be perfect. That’s why God sent His Son to cover us with His own perfect life—to give us a gift we could never earn ourselves. 

And through our many weaknesses and flaws the love and power of God shines like the North Star to those who don’t know Him yet.

And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. 2 Corinthians 12:9 NASB | HISsparrowBlog

#5 – Forgiven is forgotten. 

God has never asked us to show our piety or devotion by refusing to forgive ourselves over past sin. Nothing is gained if we keep ourselves in the past. Once we seek forgiveness and repent, our sins are no more to God. There’s no time to waste.

For I will be merciful to their iniquities, and I will remember their sins no more. Hebrews 8_12 NASB _ HISsparrowBlog

It can bring a certain measure of comfort to remember we’ve never been asked to be perfect. We’ve all made mistakes. We’ll make more mistakes. But we don’t have to wallow in the guilt and shame of our past mistakes. 

What helps you put your past mistakes behind you? Let me know in the comments below. 


Just in case you want a little more reading on the subject…


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I frequently link up with the following: Grace & Truth with Embracing the Unexpected, Tell His Story with Jeanne Takenaka, and Let’s Have Coffee with Joanne Viola.


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HISsparrowBlog

I love to help people see their value in Christ because once we understand that our potential to lead healthy lives that impact others for Christ is limitless.

This Post Has 17 Comments

  1. Robert L. Rowland

    Live in His victory now and rest in the finished work of the resurrection. “There is now no condemnation for those who are on Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1. This has been a go to verse for me for a while. Thanks for the reminder and for all you do for the Kingdom!

  2. Gena Geier

    Spot on

  3. Heather Hart

    This. Satan loves to remind of our past mistakes, doesn’t he? There are a few choice mistakes from my past that seem to come up out of the blue. Some of them our crazy small things. I’m not even sure if they qualify as mistakes. They were just situations that could have been handled better. One of them was a bad decision I wish I could change, but I can’t. All of them have been taken to Jesus. They are in the past. Now when they start to edge their way into my mind, I have to remind myself that I have been forgiven and there is no condemnation for those of us that belong to Jesus. I have one of those “Not today, Satan” conversations. It sounds cliche, but it works.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      I love your comment that you’re not even sure some things are mistakes that Satan likes to harp on. Great point. Whether they were or not, we can know they’ve been forgiven by the only One whose opinion matters. Thanks so much for stopping in, Heather!

  4. Becky Beresford

    Such good reminders! We aren’t expected to be perfect, but we are loved unconditionally by a Perfect God.

  5. Julie Lefebure

    So thankful forgiven is forgotten. This truth sets my heart free of the lies the enemy of my soul wants me to believe. So thankful for God’s unending grace! Great post!

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      That’s a big one for me, Julie. I tend to revert back to the thinking that God does forgive me like He said, but He’s also got a list of the wrongs in my life, which He’ll use to show me when I get to heaven what my life could’ve looked like. I have to remind myself that’s a lie, though, because God says He remembers our sins no more once they’ve been forgiven. What an indescribably awesome God we serve.

  6. Marilyn

    Great post! Our minds can not comprehend the depths of God’s love. I was thinking about exactly this last night and came to the realization that God is completely in control, and the hard things that have happened in our lives are actually to our benefit, and help us to become who God wants us to be.

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      Love that, Marilyn: the depths of God’s love. And power. I am continually amazed at how He can take my mistakes—and everyone else’s—and weave them into His immutable plan.

  7. Valerie Riese

    This is so beautiful, Ashley. I was swamped when this post came to my email box and I deleted it. Boy, did I miss out. I’m so glad you were featured in Grace & Truth this week, and that I took the time to read it. It’s one thing to know or be told to leave mistakes in the past – like we all know that… But you’ve really put the balm on to soothe and release the guilt.

  8. Tiffany Montgomery

    Why is it so hard to forgive ourselves for past sins? You have covered so many great points here and I was reflecting as I read through. Some of my past mistakes are present mistakes… but many of the mistakes from my past are things the enemy whispers about… and I often need help to recognize the truth and walk in it rather than the shame! Great to find you in the Grace and Truth Link UP!!!

    1. HISsparrowBlog

      I’ve always found it interesting that it was harder to forgive myself. It can really be hard sometimes with that little whisper in our ears. It’s an ongoing struggle, but it makes a huge difference when I remember that I’ve already asked forgiveness for that and can mentally tell Satan to get behind me.

  9. jerralea

    Today I was reading Psalm 130:7 that speaks of abundant redemption. He IS faithful and just to forgive us – and He doesn’t condemn. So those condeming voices in our heads are not from Him!

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